Worry Less

I think I shall print this out and hang it on my wall. Next to it though, I think it needs a "But go easy on yourself." 'Cause sometimes doing all of these things simultaneously is just exhausting. And even more exhausting is the way you feel after your criticize yourself for not doing what you should when you should. I think we are all our own worst critics, most of the time.

Surprisingly, there has been quite a lot of eating healthy, exercising, working, and staying strong going on in this house. Not surprisingly, there has also been a lot of worrying. There's a little bit of crying and whining that goes on when that favorite man of yours is so far away working. Yet, it's amazing how wonderful it can feel to just call the mother and cry it out.

I often say a lot of nonsensical things to her like, "this isn't fair," "I'm lonely even though there are lots of people who care," "no one cares though," stuff like that. Stuff that isn't true, usually. She gently reminds me that it is fair because it's work, and a lot of people don't have that. And that everyone cares, but they have their worries, too. It's easy to roll my eyes at her sentiments and think easy for you to say, you who gets to see your husband every week. Except then she tells me about when she was a young wife. And how she stood on the front porch--toddler clinging to her leg, baby on her hip--and fell apart inside as she watched my father drive away to work for weeks at a time. No cell phones, no Skype, no communication. She was so strong.

Hearing stories like that makes me think that it probably isn't so hard to be me, after all. Thanks to the wonderful world of technology, I at least get to talk to Tyler everyday. Sometimes, when I'm lucky, he even gets charming and texts things like "let's dream about each other tonight, k? somewhere on a beach."

So this week, I vow to worry less. Instead, I think I will appreciate more. I have a handsome husband who is working hard for our future. (Might I interject, I do worry some that he lives with my dad in a camp trailer. Who even knows what embarrassing stories of my childhood could arise in such a confined space.) I also have a mother full of wisdom and love. And I'm especially grateful for her as we celebrate these women gave us life.

This week, those two things are more than enough for me.